Let's start with Golden Globe winner (and diva to end all divas) Jennifer Hudson, who looked just fine, even if she's looked better every other time she's ever left the house. (Who saw her on Letterman? Show of hands? Hooker was BREATHTAKING.) I mean, she doesn't look BAD, but... Suddenly demure? Why come, Hud?
To all the haters of this outfit, I say that it's just Sienna being Sienna, man! She's a drug-addled hipster/junkie/pixie/milkmaid with a touch of Downs, and that's just what she looks like here.
It's been almost pathologically documented on this blog before, so I won't go into it again, but Angelina Jolie is the most perfect human being to ever exist. This is the dress she should have worn when she won her Oscar! Also, Brad Pitt has become Robert Redford. Fully.
This dress is super pretty, but Kate looks so washed out! That lipstick is a CREEPSHOW. She looks like the Black Dahlia poster.
Jessia Biel, you are a trannie robot! Fix your bangs.
This is going to be the cover of my Valentines Day cards. I think the inside will say something like, "Hoping this Valentines Day finds you with someone who makes you half as happy as we are. Love, Sharon Stone and Vodka."
This is precisely what JLo should always look like- Regal, chubby, and totally confused. Success.
Helen Mirren is 80 million years old and LOOK AT HER TITS. It's not fair. She's too perfect. I adore her. She has kind of a puppyface in this photo, though.
I still think that this dress was some joke that I was too wasted to get. Why would she wear that?? I mean, the bigger mystery is why she's so effin' greasy, but one thing at a time.
LOOK AT HER FUCKING HAIR. JEAN SMART, I WANT TO MARRY YOU.
Doesn't it look like Baffleck is going to punch her in this?? DO IT, BEN! She has a wonk eye! She's a fucking disaster! "Why I oughta...."
Dear Annette- I hope that this letter finds you well. Actually, I hope this letter finds you drunk. I say this because you are one of the greatest American actresses of all time, and you so fucking know it. You're no fool. You know that you had no shot at winning (even though you BEYOND deserved to), so you said to yourself, "I'm going to get tanked, not do my hair, and wear a schmatte from Fashion Bug. Fuck all a y'all." God damn it, I respect you. If the world won't give you your propers, drink up. Fondest, KEVIN.
What you can't tell from such a far-away shot is that Naomi Watt's earrings are really pretty. That's all.
What a fucking disgrace this beast is. Every fucking time. ALSO, why does she pose like that?? Does she have spinabifida?? I loathe everything about her.
MILF alert! I heart Mrs. Piven!
Julia Louis Dreyfuss looks as confused by the titties on her dress as I am.
America's favorite divorcee-to-be (Especially mine- hey lady, I wanna fuck your babydaddy!) as Valley Girl Barbie. Hilameous.
AND FINALLY... Our agreed-upon pick for Best Dressed is Ugly Betty star (and Globe winner) America Ferrera! Isn't she just as cute as a button? And she's rocking this blue-purple color. AND she's gorgeous. AND her speech was the best. Ugh, we just adore her. She makes the word "America" something to be proud of again.
Happy Fashion to one and all!!
KEVIN (and, via phone call, Leigh)
