The Great Booze-Out of June '07

So tomorrow I'm starting a Booze Abstinence. Why, you ask? Well, I've been hitting the sauce A LOT lately. And by "a lot," I mean more than usual, which for a non-Kevin person is an unfathomable amount. So because I don't want to end up like Lindsay Lohan, I'm taking a little time off from my favorite past time. Just to make sure I still can quit it. You understand, I'm sure.

Anyway, I may become irritable or irrational or moody or just generally unstable and gross. And I apologize for it in advance. We'll reconvene in mid-June and assess my progress. Wish me luck in the comments field, if you're so inclined.

xoxo KEVIN.

PS- Given the fact that Leigh is back in New York, I think taking these measures at this time is really in the best interest of my sweet, sweet liver.

Love Don't Live Here Anymore

I Heart D.C.

So, I'm in New York. But I'm vaguely depressed. The sight of my room this morning was enough to make me want to break out into a lone chorus of "Empty Chairs at Empty Tables"Last night I spent one last evening with the kids, and you would think that a bucket of tater tots and a pint of Miller Lite would have cheered me- but alas; 'twas a temporary fix.
By the time Laura and Paul walked me home I was a hugging, crying, mess. I can't wait to see what New York has in store for me, but I know one thing- I won't be seeing this when I walk out the door at night- and that's worth being a little sad over:

Tats n' Tots

Best. Weekend. Ever.
Kids, this weekend was my last in DC, and oh man- it was one for the history books. Good thing it was 3 days long! To Recap:
FRI: drinks and Photohut at the Union pub. (Friday was also day 3 of a 5 day Tater Tot binge) Followed by more drinks and around 3 hours of BUCKHUNTER.
SAT: Tattoo day. Priscilla, Laura, Paul and I each inked our skin, followed by some more quality time at Union Pub, where more tater tots were consumed and Maura, Lovely Irish Lass that she is, offered us a screening of the departed. (after the Sox game ofcourse)

TATTOO PARADE:
Priscilla: (whose full tattoo is flowers cascading down her back and looks SWEET)


Me:


Paul:

Laura:

SUN: Brunch at Eastern Market followed by a day of sloth and gluttony, epitomized by...
A Nugget Party Platter from Chik-Fil-A, and my new favorite dessert: The Lambic Float. Fancy Belgian Beer + Ice Cream = delicious
Mon: A brief respite for packing; followed by one last trip to the Burrito Hut for some frozen Mango 'ritas.
OH, it was so fantastic. Special Thanks go out to Paul and Laura, who survived nearly nearly 72 hours of insanity and were by my side for every toast and and tot. Cheers Queers.

It's here!! It's today!!

Everybody go see Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End this weeekend! It's finally here! Did anyone go see it last night at midnight? I would have but I was home with Roommate watching a different film masterpiece.

Happy Memorial Day weeekend to all! Summer 2007- Officially in gear.

XOXO Kevin.

It's ON!

I had to take a break from packing up everything I own to post this: This clip from The View makes want to watch daytime television. These two are CRAZY. I especially love the part towards the end where Joy Behar literally begs for a commerical break; and is denied. Thank you ABC. (and thank you Kathleen for alerting me to this masterpiece theatre) -L

This picture sends shivers to my very core.

So Mary Cheney had a boy. His name is Sam, I think. [Ed. Note- Sam Cheney, by the way, as Mary's wife Heather has no legal relationship with the baby in the state of Virginia.] Anyway, good for her- and I totally mean that!!-as babies are the awesomest. I'm sure that if she focuses on being a loving parent, and ignores the self-loathing that was doubtlessly bred into her by Hobgoblin & the Beast (shown above).

I think a poster in the comments section on Towleroad said it best- "Congratulations to Mary Cheney and that lady who lives in her house."

xoxo KEVIN.

A Barrow Street Evening, with Kevin and Leigh.

The laid-back leafy gorgeousness of Barrow Street, Greenwich Village, USA played setting to a reunion last night between online powerhouse personalities Kevin and Leigh, who reunited for a reading of a sexcellent new play with music by Kevin's beloved Roommate and her partner in crime. (Crime= art.) The show was great, the company was kick-ass, and above all, Kevin and Leigh got to down a few gins together and celebrate their love. Of booze. And also each other.

There's a photo to be added later, but just know that my eyes in the photo caused The Gayrab to exclaim, "Oooff! Somebody's back on pills!"

xoxo KEVIN.

PS- On my way into work this morning, I passed FIT's graduation at Radio City. I can't even describe to you what a shitstorm of madness that is.

Oh. My. GOD.

Kevin & Leigh's Sexy-Ass Blog spy Joe (who in his spare time is a noted and award-winning awesome person) was mere feet today from our shared personal all-time inspiration and icon... DOLLY MOTHERFUCKING PARTON. Dolly's in town casting the upcoming Broadway musical version of 9 to 5, for which she composed a whole new score of sure-to-be-iconic tunes. While Joe didn't get to speak to the brilliant living legend, he did hear nothing but euphoric comments from the people who have been working with her all week. (Not that that is any surprise- People regularly toss around "nicest person I've ever worked with"-style comments for our beloved diva.)

Stay forever, Dolly!! We will always love you!!

xoxo KEVIN.

Agh!! Why haven't I written anything in so long?? -OR- A week's worth of thoughts from Kevin's mind

Note: The Bangles are in no way related to this post. I've just been digging on them lately.

Hey everybody... OH MAN, I haven't written anything since last Friday?? Really?? Fuck. I blow. Aaaaaaanyway-

To second Leigh's articulate and spirited thoughts about two things: I am DELIGHTED that Jerry Falwell is dead, dead, dead and that Hot Fuzz is the most kick-ass movie in ages. Let's start with the death of the asshole...

(1) You can find some awesome thoughts by Christopher Hitchens from his appearance on AC360 HERE. As a sidenote, I wish I could fully devote myself to Chris Hitchens. His book about atheism sounds killer, and I'm so glad he wrote it, but... He's such a war fan. Boo. Oh well. Next time, Hitchy.

(2) This photo is from an article about the reaction at Liberty University to Falwell's death. Why is that crying guy so hot?? I need to comfort him, I think. I'm talkin' downtown!! Whoa!!

(3) Ann Coulter chimed in with some typically lovely thoughts regarding Falwell's passing. She's just darling.

My love for Hot Fuzz might be a little bit illegal. It led to one of those laughing jags that just end in me slumped in a movie seat, spent and exhausted. Everyone needs to see it. It will hand your ass back to you. Awesomeness.

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Tuesday was Roommate's birthday. While this isn't usually a huge drinking day, Wednesday was Kevin's Liver Memorial Hangover Awareness Day. We dined chez Junior's and had some awesome old-fashioned cocktails- Woo-Woos, Rusty Nails, Havey Wallbangers, Manhattans, and the curious Thug Passions. All were awesome. But the nightcaps did me in. Oh GOD, the nightcaps. Aaaaaaaaaa.

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So the Tony nominations were announced on Tuesday. While I was disappointed that the lame, lifeless waste of over-hyped media attention Spring Awakening had such a strong showing AND that my beloved Legally Blonde got snubbed, I can at least take solace in the fact that bane of the universe Kristin Chenoweth was snubbed too. Ugh, that fucking loathsome creature. She even showed up last night to besmirch the otherwise-SPECTACULAR "Ugly Betty" season finale. (God, I love that show.)

In other theatrical news, the powers that be LOVE Fantasia Barrino in The Color Purple. Whuh-whuh? Really? Well.... OK. I guess I'll see it.

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A serious, important, can't-miss-it music recommendation: Emotionalism, the new album from The Avett Brothers. (I saw them last Saturday with Joe and Coworker Alison... Unreal. They blew my mind.)

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Are Amy Fisher and Joey Buttface really getting a reality show? This can't be real, right? This is jeopardizing my never-wavering love you for, Amy!!

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I'm sure the immigration deal that was reached yesterday (which actually sounds really, really awesome to me) probably isn't as fantastic as I think it is. I mean, Republicans agreed to it, so how good could it be? Right? Leave opinions in the comments field.

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One week til Pirates of the Caribbean: At World's End. Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

I have run out of steam. I have to lie down. Thanks for reading, everyone.

xoxo KEVIN.

Starting to get Sentimental...

As excited as I am to move to New York, I am beginning to realize just how much I will miss the District. There are certain things one can only do in DC.
It really hit me this morning, when I was at the CVS near work. Can you refill a prescription and buy Merlot at the same time in New York? no. In Virginia pills & booze are one stop shopping!
In other DC news- last weekend was EU Embassy open house day. There were Gummibärchen at the German Embassy; France had Champagne-But the surprise winner was Sweden; who offered access to their kick-ass roof deck with views of the Potomac...

and some very amusing displays of Swedish poetry:

Teletubbies Rejoice!

As I've mentioned to some of you, I know it is wrong to speak ill of the dead- but in this particular case I'm willing to make an exception.
Jerry Falwell has died.
Meaning this planet now has one less judgemental christian zealot who gives religion a bad name by badmouthing 90% of the population.
Somewhere, Larry Flynt is cracking a giant smile; and a bottle of champagne. Which he should share with the purple teletubby...

Pomp & Circumstance

I am officially a Master. (of Education)
While my classmates celebrated this momentous occasion by donning caps, gowns, and those god awful hoods- I chose to go a different route.
First, I went with Laura and Paul to see the movie which restored my faith in motion pictures (previously knocked out by such fare as "Next" and "Spiderman"Don't even get me started on Spiderman).
I'm talking of course about :HOT FUZZ.
By the power of Greyskull, get up and go this movie. RIGHT NOW. it is SO GOOD. and SO BRITISH. it made us SO HAPPY. I mean, how could anyone not like a film which openly references Point Break?
The graduation celebration continued with dinner and drinks, followed by a concert by the superb LCD Soundsystem at the 9:30 Club. Where we danced our little hearts out. (or rather we swayed and tapped our feet it was kind of crowded...)
It was the best graduation I ever (not) attended !

THANK YOU FOR SMOKING

So even following the death of Jack Valenti, the man who sold the motion picture industry down the river to appease the churchy set, the MPAA continues its reign of utter laughable bullshit. It was announced today that SMOKING in movies would be taken into consideration, along with sexual content and violence, for determining an R rating.

I want to throw up and move away. Apparently, this is a nation of god damn fucking babies who can't hear bads words or see CIGARETTES IN FUCKING MOVIES. AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA It just makes me so angry. Movie ratings are assinie and should be abolished. When filmmakers are forced to cowtow to the MPAA, sacrificing artistic content for the "joy" of playing in more multiplexes (which a cuddly, whitebread rating allows them to do), something is very, very, VERY wrong.

Not cool, America. Not effin' cool.

An enraged KEVIN.

Cheerio, Old Chap!

Well, this is what you get for supporting our sham war/fearless leader.
If only America allowed for votes of no confidence... but I digress. There is but one thing this major political event should have us all focusing on:

Will Prime Minister's Questions ever be the same?

Never in my 40 years in the theatre...

... have I seen a photo like this. WOW, DO I LOVE THIS WOMAN. LOOK AT HOW SHE'S LOOKING AT HIM. Oh, god. Oooohhh, goooood. I can't breathe.

xoxo KEVIN.

Everybody dance/ Do do do do clap your hands

So I think I'm developing a bit of a problem.

Last Thursday- Went dancing.

Last Friday- Went dancing.

Saturday- Went dancing.

Sunday- Went dancing.

Last night- Stayed home, but watched Dancing With The Stars.

Tonight- Dancing, projected.

Like, who am I?! This really isn't like me, j'swear. Like... Wow. Also, I've learned a few lessons from My Danceweek:

1. I'm not as good at line dancing as Nashville led me to believe.
2. Leigh twirls like a demon.
3. Excessive execution of "The Death Crane" can lead to Disco Elbow.

I feel wiser because of these observations, and I also feel more than a little in love with Susan Somerville.

xoxo KEVIN.

You gotta have Heart....

Kevin and I attended the "Heart Party" on Sat, and it was EPIC. There were speeches. There were awards. There was the Time Squares Orchestra. There was Alexa Ray Joel. And mostly importantly; there was my mother-who was the evening's honoree; and quite honestly the belle of the ball.

Kevin proved to be a stellar date, adept at purse holding, hand shaking, and most importantly, twirling me on the dance floor. In fact; people repeatedly told my mother that my boyfriend was a good dancer. (ahahahahaha. boyfriend.)

My Mother and I, making an entrance...

The GC Hotel. Actually swanky?


Downeaster Alexa; workin' the crowd.

Kevin n' Leigh'n' Downeaster
This a photo collage I created of us hosting an after party at Waterzooi; which featured varying family members as well as special guests such as Joe and The Gayrab.
I really might need to hang this on the wall of apartment.
Once again, EPIC.

Spend your movie dollars wisely...

I want to discuss with you two movies which made me cry last weekend, for very different reasons.
First up: Next. A movie which made me weep: with laughter.
How, in the name of Francis Ford Coppola, does Nicholas Cage still have a career?
This was, hands down, one of the top ten worst films ever made, at least in the category of films which took themselves seriously. The "plot": Nicholas "still rocking that horrible rug from Ghostrider" Cage can see exactly two minutes into his own future- except when he's in he presence of one Jessica Biel, when he can see further. Julianne Moore (slumming it in the worst possible way) plans on harvesting this power to stop a nuclear attack. No, really.
This movie has it all. Really bad CGI. Horrible Dialogue. One of America's finest actresses in a role which reduces her to grabbing assualt weapons and shooting people (Note that she is made to wear tan, brown, and black in the same outfit). And, to top it all off, a rip off from a clock work orange!(This is where the laugh-o-meter really kicked in) Did I mention that we have to watch Jessica Biel sleep with Nicholas Cage? Yuck. To Quote Manohola:
"In Next; a crummy action and speculative-fiction hybrid, Nicholas Cage plays a guy who can see into the future two minutes at a time. It’s too bad that Mr. Cage couldn't tap into those same powers of divination to save himself from making yet another inexplicably bad choice in roles."
Onto MUCH better things;

The Wind that Shakes The Barley: A Movie which made me weep : For the Motherland. Oh Danny Boy. Ireland, 1920. Britain is occupying the place and making everyone miserable, Cillian Murphy gives up his career as a doctor to fight the (sometimes) good fight. So SAD. So Moving. So sad in fact, that I had to immediately retreat to a bar afterwards and drink a pint. Suffice to say the British were truly evil to the Irish back in the day. Also Cillian Murphy can ACT. Has anyone seen this yet? It was very European, but in the best sense. I'd like your thoughts. The cinematography alone is worth the price of admission.
To quote A.O. :
“The Wind That Shakes the Barley” hardly feels like a closed book or a museum display. It is as alive and as troubling as anything on the evening news, though far more thoughtful and beautiful."
SIDEBAR: This time tomorrow Kevin and I will be in Black Tie Attire drinking Champagne.
At The Garden City Hotel. Yesssssss.

Oh my god- GAY.

Jim McGreevey is becoming a priest.

I mean, it's easy to joke about everyone's favorite Gay American, but this really is just one more bizarre nail in the coffin of his story. I refuse to even go to his Wikipedia page for fear of what other bizarre shit is going on. Did anyone see this coming?? I mean, he WAS all Jesus-y when he was on Oprah, but... Ugh. This is sad. And weird. I'm creeped out.

To me, it seems obvious that this will spawn an off-Broadway musical called Late Night Catechism with Father Jim. I mean, the show practically writes itself. And then it practically books itself into 37 Arts. And finally, it practically closes itself after an unsuccessful run.

(SIDEBAR: Dina Matos-McGreevey is making a strong run for the coveted Kevin & Leigh Award for Asshole of the Year 2007. Last year's winner, while never officially announced due to Kevin's laziness, was Jennifer Aniston.)

Peace out, all. xoxo KEVIN.

"When you're four strokes up, you can afford to be conservative."

Roommate and I attended Radio Golf last night, and it fucking blew my mind. Everyone should go. How the late, colossal August Wilson, who had written a bajillion plays (all of them awesome), hadn't run out of relevent, timely observations by the time he got around to Radio Golf, I have no idea. Since Roomie and I are living in the heart of "urban renewal" and can attest firsthand what absolutely fucking bullshit it is, we were especially down with RG 's affecting portrayal of a community selling its soul.

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I'm reading The Year of Magical Thinking. Has anyone else read it? It's GOOD.

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Am I the only person really, really not excited for Spider-Man 3?

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My back hurts. Like, a lot.

-Love, Kevin.