Mike Ettannani and other bad things that happened to me today

As you can see, Christmas Mania is sweeping "Kevin & Leigh's Sexy-Ass Blog." I think we've all caught a little bit of the holiday cheer. It's going around. And speaking of things that are going around, it's World AIDS Day (let's all take a moment to acknowledge the fact that I am going to Hell).

I just missed my dear friend Josie's recital because I HAD to see a 65-minute play, starring this dottering old man who talks about his life as a theatre producer, opera singer, and painter. It was called "Falling Off Broadway," but I plan to call it "Falling Off.... Fuck You, You Old Douche. Your Show Is Boring." Now it's 10pm, Kate's rehearsing with her ol' ball and chain, and I'm in a quandry as to whether or not I should start "Lost" without her. My mom says it's good.... and if my mom says so.... Ya know...

I wanna get back to Shout Outs and Shout Downs. I like doing them.

SHOUT OUTS TO: Broadway.com, for fucking up my phone when I switched desks so I didn't have to do any work today (BOO-YAH!); Cara Joy David, for letting me rock in her rocking chair instead of doing work; Lauren Graham for being so funny on "Gilmore Girls" last night that the tiniest little part of me wanted to have sex with her; Mike's friend Don for writing an email far funnier than anything I could ever devise; and finally, Marissa Hansson for LOUDLY discussing her dislike for anal sex over a lunch of soup and sandwich. I'm sure Dean & Deluca appreciate it too.

SHOUT DOWNS TO: The Georgetown Library, for being Mike's surrogate boyfriend (and yet being unable to fulfill his sexual needs); Leigh's roomate Mara for having a blog funnier than mine/ours; the New York Times for publishing an article about vaginal plastic surgery that made me giggle on the subway this morning and therefore earn reproachful glares from a lot of hispanic women; the National Board of Review for giving Best Picture to "Finding Neverland," which is clearly just a pussy's version of "Big Fish."

BIGGEST SHOUT OUT OF THE DAY: Michael Moore. Just because. I love him to death.
SECOND BIGGEST SHOUT OF THE DAY: Mike Ettannani, for just IM'ing me "My tits look great in these jeans."

Peace of the Lord be with you all.
KEVIN :-)